TV producer Richard Cook has recently relocated to NYC for work. Every week, he shares his outrageous dating experiences.
Americans date differently to us Brits! First off the Grindr/Scruff greeting du jour isn’t ‘hey’ but ‘sup’. What? Like what you do to a pint? I’m still not sure how to reply.
Americans are a lot more forward too and don’t tend to get absolutely wasted in a bar before making their move. And they like to date. (Non-commital days or nights out where you get to know each other better!)
I had a date recently with a very handsome man, slightly older and a bit shorter than me (5’5 to my 6’2) – very much my type. We met in a gallery in the Lower East Side of Manhattan and despite the fact the two of us looked something like a mop and a bucket as we walked around the exhibition, we got on incredibly well. American humour is famously not as sarcastic as our British sensibility, but he was cheeky and charming and made the date really easy.
He asked me what I did for work, I explained I was a TV producer and asked him what he did.
‘I’m a sexographer,’ he said.
I think I must have done one of those cartoon double takes – he laughed.
His job, it turns out, is to choreograph sex scenes for TV shows and film. (Yes, people do do this!) He explained that he had worked on some amazing, big budget films, including one in particular notorious for its explicitness and quantity of sex scenes. He explained that most Hollywood directors don’t really like directing sex scenes as it’s always so awkward telling actors how to fake-fuck. His job is to work with the actors to make them feel comfortable with each other so that the scenes are as convincing as possible. Basically, he sexographs films.
During the date be shared gossip from some of the sets he’d worked on; an A List Hollwood star with an alarmingly large ball-bag that kept falling out of his “cock sock’ and slapped relentlessly against his fellow actor’s leg. Another Hollywooder would rise to the occasion more than is legally permitted to be shown in non-porn films. My date explained in that situation he had to pull the actor off set. So to speak!
After another date and more chemistry and lots of fun we eventually ended back at his place where one thing led to another and before long we were in the throws of passion in his bed…. ‘You’d look really hot if you’d just put your leg like that,’ he said, and so I obliged. ‘If you just go there, it would really work for me,’ again I obliged….. all of a sudden, I realised – I was being sexographed!
And I liked it.